Showing posts with label decisions. Show all posts
Showing posts with label decisions. Show all posts

Tuesday, November 8, 2016

(Belated) Song for Sunday: Sister Suffragettes


I almost forgot to write this blog post and I haven't written in so long I am not sure I have any readers left, but anyway, here goes.


We watched Mary Poppins as a family not too long ago and I was struck by this song. It hopefully sings out:

"Our daughter's daughters will adore us
as they sing in grateful chorus
'Well done, Sister Suffragettes'"

Alas, I think in general it's wrong. Not about women voting, about their granddaughters being thankful...or even remembering.

It's election day here in the US and many women are wearing white as a sign of thankfulness for women's right to vote and run for political office. We have, for the first time, a female candidate from a major political party running for president. (We have actually had women candidates for years and, by the way, this doesn't indicate how I voted. I am not going there here.)  But most of the time I think we forget that gaining the right to vote was the hard won struggle of women who worked for nearly century to gain suffrage. And it hasn't even been a century since they succeeded.

This is a fun song. It's also humorous, contrasting a wife's progressive views with her husband's staunchly traditional ones.







The women's suffrage movement had a bit of a checkered history, making alliances with racists and advocating violent action. I don't condone either of those tactics.

I am, however, grateful to be able to vote...and enjoy Mary Poppins.

Check out this link on the history of the Suffragette Movement in the US.
http://www.history.com/topics/womens-history/the-fight-for-womens-suffrage
And in England:
http://www.parliament.uk/about/living-heritage/transformingsociety/electionsvoting/womenvote/overview/startsuffragette-/



Did you vote?

Sunday, July 17, 2016

Song for Sunday: Details in the Fabric (In Memory of Tom Serewicz)

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I heard on the radio the other day that one third of all traffic accidents involve a driver under the influence of alcohol. One third.

And that’s only some of the preventable accidents. Other forms of impaired driving involve distractions like texting, cell phone use or playing games on devices. Inexperienced drivers are also often distracted by other passengers, by the radio, by food or by coffee and other soft drinks. Everyone who drives while impaired or distracted has made a choice to do so. In some cases, others on hand have allowed it.

Friends, our choices matter.

They mattered to Tom Serewicz and his family. Tom was just 24 when he and his best friend were on their way home from a night fishing trip. Their car was struck by the car of a drunk and drugged driver who was going the wrong way on the highway. All three were killed.  It was June 17, 2011.

Tom left behind a wife, two very young sons, a mother and two sisters. Their heartbreak continues five years later and will continue as long as they live. That woman’s choice ended her life, and two other lives, and had a horrible impact on two families.

One of Tom’s sisters is a dancer. She choreographed the song Details in the Fabric by Jason Mraz as a testament to how the family clung to each other after the accident and supported each other in their grief. It is a moving testimony to their love for Tom and each other.

A sample of the lyrics:

Hang on
Help is on the way
And stay strong
I'm doing everything


Details in the Fabric is today’s “Song for Sunday.”  Here’s a link to it.





 Live Kindly, Choose Responsibly



Learn more about Tom and how to end drunk driving here:

Drunk Driving
Ending Drunk Driving
Drunk Driving
Celebrating a Life
Drunk Driving: In Memory of Tom Serewicz


The Thomas J. Serewicz, Sr. Foundation for Kind &Responsible Living remembers Tom’s loving and generous spirit by supporting a variety of charities and hosting an annual memorial picnic, which I attended today.


I met Tom and his wife, Cherise, at the Christian YouthConference at Ocean Park (CYC), when they were teenagers. It was where they met and decided to marry. (I looked after Cherise’s engagement ring once while she was out on a service project doing physical labor.) CYC meets for two weeks every August in Maine and is open to all high schoolers. There are still slots available for the 2016 conference. Check it out!







Saturday, July 2, 2016

Getting Organized -- Playroom, Final Update




 We started here:






 And now we're here!






 I'm happy. 

Understand me, the room is by no means "done."  But my goal was to have a usable room that was lived in, as opposed to a total disaster by July1. I think I got that far. In fact, my husband is doing a project up there as I write. 

My son now has a surface for lego-building and he and his friends can play games or have sleep-overs in there. 

It was thoroughly dusted and vacuumed for the first time in a while as well. 

Next goal? Make it a public room, with the rest of the boxes cleared out and it being consistently tidy. That way we can take adults up there for board games or hold club meetings up there. An we need to make that sustainability plan I mentioned before. 


 But I'd say I made my goal.

 I remember that I attended a homeschool support group meeting on getting organized once. There was a quote: "Unmade decisions are one of the greatest sappers of energy." I am glad over this past month to have made many decisions regarding things. Some are now displayed. Others have been put away, returned to their owner, given away, donated, recycled or trashed. I think the quote is true. 

I also think that being publicly accountable by posting here helped greatly. Thanks to those who have been part of this!

So, how are your projects coming along? 



Getting Organized -- Playroom Update 1 Update 2
Update 3 




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On of the places I learned to stick to commitments was CYC. It's a great place for teens to learn about God and leadership while making friends and having fun. Two weeks every August in Maine. Check out our website!

Wednesday, June 1, 2016

Getting Organized --Playroom

Every once in a while I've posted "Getting Organized" articles. They've been my "success stories:"
Something Accomplished (Garage)
Getting Organized -- Kitchen!
Getting Organized -- Kitchen, Part 2



  Today I am writing about one of my trouble spots. Our "play room".(HELP!!)

It's been in this state for years. Since we moved in, except for an occasional brief period of usability. 
Five years is too long. It's time to stop this "yo-yo diet" style 
of organization and get down to business. 


I think that might take some public accountability. Hence, this post. I'd love it if you'd keep after me. My goal?  A lived in but functional room in one month. July 1. If it's not ready by then, I might have to higher a professional organizer. (Which isn't in my budget.)

But, honestly, this can't go on. 

 
Of course I still have my regular housekeeping and spring cleaning as well, so say a prayer for me. 

I'll post weekly updates, to keep myself on track.


What's your biggest organizing challenge?

Monday, May 9, 2016

Meme-ic Monday: Lawn Pesticides



  I saw this meme and added it to my Facebook page. It speaks to something very important to me: environmental toxins.  (There are some good comments, too, where the image was originally posted. Ignore the disrespectful ones.)


So first off, I have no idea if the "80 million pounds" is correct. Memes don't cite sources and don't have a great reputation for accuracy. 

I do know that a lot of pesticides and artificial fertilizers are dumped on lawns every year. I see people do it. I see the little yellow signs that warn that pets and children should be kept off the grass. Even if it's "only" a million pounds instead of 80 million it's still far too much. 

The true part of this meme is that we are doing it to ourselves. No one forces a homeowner to spray herbicide to get rid of dandelions or add organophosphates to the soil. We make choices that have serious effects on those around us. 

Also, on the bees. The bees are endangered by all this spray. We need the bees and other pollinators to maintain our food supply. A choice between a perfect lawn and a sustainable supply of food? I know which way I'm going. 

I've written about this before in Pesticides, Lawns, and Pride. My thoughts on it haven't changed much.  


What are yours?



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On Mondays, I will be posting and responding to memes, one each week. They will be ones that grab my attention, perhaps either resonate with me or annoy me. If you see a meme you would like me to react to, let me know.


Saturday, May 16, 2015

Death Penalty

"Many that live deserve death. And some die that deserve life. Can you give it to them? Then be not too eager to deal out death in the name of justice, fearing for your own safety. Even the wise cannot see all ends."
                                                                  ~Gandalf the Grey
                                                                in Fellowship of the Ring
                                                                   by J.R.R Tolkein



It's been just over two years since the Boston Marathon was shattered and marred by bombs. Two years since an act of terrorism horrified -- and galvanized -- a city. 

We saw evil that day. We saw good that day.

Two brothers were believed responsible. One died before being brought to trial. The other has been convicted on 30 counts of murder, attempted murder, terrorism.

The jury has decided that he should die, that he deserved the death penalty. Perhaps they are right. 

I do not find this a cause for celebration. That a young man could go so far wrong, is horrifying, saddening. That he be killed for it may be just, but it won't bring back those he killed or restore the legs of those who lost them. It will not erase memories. 

It won't even bring closure. Appeals, potentially years of them, will keep this case alive and before the victims. That it will bring more anguish is why the Richards Family asked that the death penalty be taken off the table.

I do not know what is right, what is best. I favor banning the death penalty, because the justice system isn't perfect and because I am pro-life. In this instance, the facts are clear and guilt has been admitted, albeit with the claim of undue influence from an older brother and the mitigating factor of a dysfunctional family. Still, we are all ultimately responsible for our own actions and choices.

Gandalf is right that even the wise can not see all ends and I am far from wise. I do not know what should happen here. 

Whatever it is, though, I won't be celebrating. I will pray for the soul of this young man. I will pray even harder for the healing of his victims. 


I will pray for us all as we seek peace and a world beyond terrorism.

God bless.

Wednesday, April 8, 2015

Mouse in the House

I am not afraid of mice. 

Correction. I was not afraid of mice. Actually, I used to raise them at the  Small Animal Center my 4H club ran in high school. We rescued them from closing shelters even. They were cute. The teachers used them in biology, to demonstrate animal behavior. In psychology class, we taught them to run mazes. I enjoyed the little critters.

But now there is one in my kitchen and I am terrified. Can't even walk in the room without being scared of it jumping out at me.

To be fair to myself, this is a wild mouse. Much more likely to spread disease than the domesticated kinds kept as pets.


So what to do?

First off, calm down and get some perspective. I mean, it's a mouse. Maybe a family of mice .. but still.

After that, get rid of the mice.

How to go about that?

After some internet research, I told the guy at the hardware store... local place, for sure...that I didn't mind killing the mouse, but I'd rather not have poison in my kitchen. He agreed and gave me a quick killing trap. I also picked up some steel wool for sticking in the hole I found under my sink. I want to use organic methods.

I have located the most likely spot for the nest, but I haven't looked there yet, because, for some reason, I am afraid of mice. 

*sigh* Back to step one. 

I am also rethinking killing the mouse. Maybe a live trap would be better. 'Cause even though I am afraid of him, he is kind of cute and I don't like killing any living creature. 

Then again he was bold as brass last night running about my kitchen and keeping me from my housework. My son wants to look for that nest. He also wants me to pay him for catching the mouse and getting rid of it.




What would you do?  




This is my seventh post for the April 2015 Ultimate Blog Challenge.

Saturday, October 4, 2014

Taking Orders ... Impaired Driving

Recently, I obeyed a direct order from my teenage son.

I do not, as a general policy, believe that parents should take orders from their children. It is supposed to be the other way around. So, maybe I should explain.

It was actually the first day of high school in our homeschool. We progressed quite well through academics and I planned on cooking a special meal for the evening. I took a nap to try, unsuccessfully, to rid myself of a headache and then went downstairs. I got my shopping bags and keys. My son asked me what I was doing. I told him I was going grocery shopping for his treat.

He looked at me and said, "Bed. Now." ........and I climbed obediently back up the stairs and into bed.

Later I was a bit chagrined at myself for simply doing as I was I told. Then I thought about it. I believe it was a good thing that I did just that. Why? Here are a few reasons:

That headache was debilitating. My driving would have been impaired. I could have harmed myself or someone else or worse. I did not belong on the road and apparently my judgment was impaired enough that I didn't realize it. So, it's a good thing that someone stopped me from getting behind the wheel, regardless of the fact that the someone was 36 years my junior and in my care besides.

It set an example for Jordan. Someday, for whatever reason, he may be impaired and wanting to drive. If someone tries to stop him, in that moment he just might remember that his mother accepted the fact that she could not drive when she was told not to. Stranger things have happened.

It empowered Jordan. He learned that it works when you tell an impaired person not to drive. If I had disciplined him for speaking up, that might have given him a different message and someday when the driver he is with is drunk, or distracted, or exhausted, he might  keep quiet. We don't want that.

I still maintain that teenagers do not get to order their parents about or set the house rules. But there are moments ...


Your thoughts?

Tuesday, April 8, 2014

Pantry Challenge: One Week Down

A week ago, I explained that I am participating in an April Pantry Challenge: Buying only perishable items to give my pantry a spring cleaning and save a bit of money.


Look at my earlier post: Pantry Challenge for details of how it works.




So far, so good.


I am within budget for the first two-week segment, although I am down to a little over $12 for perishable items if I am to stay within that goal. I have stuff on hand, though, and we are away for the weekend, so I may be able to pull it off. If not, perhaps I will take a little from next segment.


I have spent less than $20 from the "Treats & Meals on the Road" budget line. I am trying to keep $75 for the trip.


I haven't bought any pantry items and have used up bits and bobs - I am down to one packet of frozen vegetables and have only a little barley left.


There is still plenty of rice (white and brown), pasta, flax seed, etc. We still have two boxes of cereal, too.

So all in all, this is working out fine.


What are you challenging yourself with right now?  How's it going?

Thursday, January 30, 2014

Urgency and Importance

I haven't been writing much lately, but I was inspired to write this post today.

Back in college, I was given a little booklet of an article by Charles Hummel called Tyranny of the Urgent. Honestly, I never read it but the title frequently comes back to me. I know that the idea of the article is that the "urgent" often crowds out what is important.

Today, I had plans to clean my playroom/schoolroom. This has been a project long in the making. Sometimes, the room gets to usable condition, but it has never been fully organized and it always slips back to cluttered. I have made a couple of strides recently and want to keep going, so I was going to give it some attention and had set a goal to complete two aspects of the organizing.

Then, I was asked to host a group at the last minute. I was happy to be asked and to host.

The focus of our housekeeping changed for the day. Suddenly it became "urgent" to tidy up the downstairs and deep clean the bathrooms. Plans for the playroom went out the window -- and we won't be able to reschedule until next week. Oh, well.

Did the urgent overtake the important? In terms of housekeeping, yes. I really do want that playroom ready and need to prioritze the work on it. (Then again, hosting that meeting and helping out the group was important, too. Urgent vs. important is not always that clear cut I guess.)

I do wonder how often maybe I set aside important things, spiritually, emotionally, relationally in favor of the urgent. Something to keep in mind.


How has the "urgent" "tyrannized" you?

Friday, October 4, 2013

Prayer for a New Business


 I am starting a new business. It is a crafting business. I think that it is good to start all things with prayer. I went search for a prayer for a new business today and found this on Prayers for Special Help. It is exactly the prayer I want.

Dear Lord,

I ask for your help in starting my own business. You are my strongest ally, and my best partner. Please join me in this new venture so that I may succeed For myself, my family and the customers I will serve. Grant me your powers of good judgment, Your wisdom and guidance, So that my business may prosper and do right by us all in Your Heavenly name.

Thank you!

Amen



I ask that those of you who pray to God join me in praying for this new craft business of mine.

What prayers are you seeking right now?

Are you doing anything new?






I am participating in the October 2013 Ultimate Blog Challenge. This is post #3 of 31.






Tuesday, July 16, 2013

Getting Organized -- Kitchen!

Well, I need to organize my kitchen a bit better, but I lacked both motivation and inspiration, to my mind essential ingredients in getting this sort of work accomplished.

Inspiration came from a blogging buddy's post. I highly recommend this article if you have organizing to do.  I began to take baby steps and the motivation is coming along.

So far, I cleaned out a few drawers and started using one of them as a new home for oven mits and hot pads which used to clutter a section of the counter.

I moved the blender to a more convenient spot.

I cleaned the top of the bookcase and then the underside of the shelf above it and hung up some herbs to dry.

I also started to use more canisters. I had three full ones -- holding whole wheat flour, white flour and sugar -- and five empty ones. I have now filled two canisters with tea bags. One of those canisters is actually labeled "Tea;" the other says "Coffee." Well, we don't drink coffee at my house, but I figure this canister won't mind being "re-purposed." Another canister I filled with rice and I plan to use one for lentils. The fifth, a tiny one, will remain empty for the moment.

I have a lot more to do, especially rearranging pots and pans. Things are going in fits and starts, but I feel like I have accomplished something. Onward and upward!


How about you? How are your projects coming along? Do you have any organizing tips to share?



Tuesday, July 2, 2013

On Facebook

My son now has a Facebook account. We allowed it primarily so that he can have access to his photography group without going through my account and so that he can keep in touch with geographically distant relatives.

We are, however, limiting who he can friend. It's a very short list. Family and a few friends from church and CYC. That's it. Also, he does not have his password yet. He can only log on with a parent. He also has to be friends with his parents.

This isn't just -- or even primarily -- a concern over "safety" and "appropriateness." Those are factors. Jordan needs to learn how to deal with dangerous situations in all contexts, including online. It's also important for him to recognize when something isn't appropriate for him to see --whether it's just for now or ever -- and look away.

There's another aspect of social media that needs to be addressed and is probably the most important. My son needs to learn how to present himself online. Whether he is updating his own status, commenting on someone else's or sharing a link, he needs to think about how others will perceive it and if he's sending the message he intends. Is he coming across politely and respectfully? Is he being unintentionally hurtful? Could his phrasing be clearer?

Some of this will be learned by trial and error. That's part of the reason for starting with a small friends list. These are people who will "love him anyway" if he missteps. I will also be giving him some guidance in these early days so that he understands the why of certain things and doesn't go too far out of line.

That's not to say I'll be constantly looking over his shoulder. Unless he asks for my help with wording, private chats and messages will be for him and the recipient. Only if he gets a message from someone he doesn't know or one that makes him feel uncomfortable is he required to disclose it. It's the more public stuff I want to help him navigate.

I also want to ensure that he doesn't become either overwhelmed or "obsessed" with online stuff. I see that as a parent's role.

Gradually, we will release full responsibility for my son's online behavior and connections to him. Our hope is that this time of training will prepare him to make wise decisions.


What has been your experience with young teens online?




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Christian Youth Conference at Ocean Park (CYC) is a quality two week leadership development program for high school teens. Meeting for two weeks in August on the beautiful southern coast of Maine, it offers a blend of worship, Christian education and recreation. Check it out!
 

Monday, January 14, 2013

Books Are Dangerous

Well, good books are. Ones that have something to say, that make you think. Inane books can be fun or   help us take a break, but they aren't dangerous.

In The Giver, Lois Lowry asks us to imagine a "safe" society. Much has been taken away ... choice of spouse, choice of work, weather, color, love....and books. Each household has only three books: a dictionary, a practical guide to the community and a book of rules. In school, students are taught precision of language, science and technology, and civics. No history, no literature. Risk has been reduced, but at a price. There is no depth to life, no feelings. Things are always predictable, calm, the same. The community seems wrong, even before its darker side is revealed.

Taking away books and history is the only way for the community to function. If they had those things, the order of life would almost inevitably be challenged. If people could think for themselves, they would insist on choices and inevitably some would make the wrong ones. People generations back had chosen safety over freedom.

As we let our children read books, we expose them to new ideas and new ways of thinking. It's a risk. They may grow up to be different from us, perhaps in ways that will break our hearts. They may choose wrong paths.

But, if we keep them on the right path by limiting what they read too far, they aren't actually choosing the right path. They are just following, without really understanding what they are doing and they might do that all their lives..... a frightening thought.

Beyond that, being dangerous isn't the same as being evil. Here's a quote from one of my favorite books:
Gimli said, "But you speak of him as if he were a friend. I thought Fangorn was dangerous."
    "Dangerous!" cried Gandalf. "And so am I, very dangerous: more dangerous than anything you will ever meet, unless you are brought alive before the seat of the Dark Lord. And Aragorn is dangerous, and Legolas is dangerous. You are beset with dangers, Gimli son of Gloin; for you are dangerous yourself, in your own fashion. Certainly the forest of Fangorn is perilous - not least to those that are too ready with their axes; and Fangorn himself, he is perilous too; yet he is wise and kindly nonetheless."
                                                                     J.R.R. Tolkien, The Two Towers

The protagonists -- honorable folk --  are here described as dangerous. They are -- lethal shots, deadly fighters. But they are right and good, as well. Only evil need fear them.

Books are dangerous because they change us. They can upset the status quo, give voice to injustice, sound warnings about trends and systems. They do it by introducing realities to people who haven't been able to see them, by planting new ideas.

Yes, some of those ideas are wrong, even evil. One of the things we need to learn is how to distinguish between good and bad arguments, right and wrong patterns, acceptable and unacceptable ways of thinking.  As we encounter these things in books and stories, we learn to evaluate them in the real world. It's an important part of education and a good reason to study a broad array of literature.


What dangerous books have you encountered? 
How have they changed you?




I am participating in the January 2013 Ultimate Blog Challenge.

Thursday, November 29, 2012

15 Minutes

We had a homeschool support group meeting the other night on the topic of "Keeping the Home in Homeschooling". We talked about building a family, maintaining a home and meeting your child's educational needs. It was an active discussion.

One thing that came up was The Fly Lady's idea that "You can do ANYTHING for 15 minutes." She encourages people to set a timer for 15 minutes and tackle a task.

With this in mind I am going to do two things every day for 15 minutes:

Clean my playroom

            This space is currently a disaster. I look at it and shut the door. No more. Everyday for 15
            minutes I will clean and organize it.


Knit

           This is not an onerous task. I quite enjoy it. But this baby is going to born and I want the blanket
          to be done without me pulling allnighters in April. So, I will find 15 minutes a day to knit.


Easy goals right?

Here's hoping I can be consistent!


What do you need to work on 15 minutes a day?


Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Voting

There is a lot of important stuff being voted on today. President, various other offices, ballot questions.

Two days ago, I wrote a piece trying to persuade people to vote against Physician Assisted Suicide. It is relatively easy to take a position on a ballot question. You are only dealing with one issue.

Candidates are another matter.

I took the "I Side With" presidential election quiz. It turns out that I am in 70% agreement with one particular candidate but I won't be voting for them because I do not believe they are the best person to lead our country.  We'll never agree with anyone on everything. I checked the things that are highest on my priority list, and none of the candidates is on the same side as I on all those issues -- or even a majority of them.

I have been an unenrolled voter all along because I do not feel there is a party that represents me.

But, along with the issues, there is leadership style, governmental philosophy and character to consider. And it's hard to see through the hype, spin and stagecraft to discover what a candidate is really like.

Voting is tough. I encourage you to do it anyway. Prayerfully, thoughtfully, carefully.


Have a blessed day...... and thank God that we have a say in government, as flawed as our system is.




Sunday, November 4, 2012

Physician Assisted Suicide.

I live in Massachusetts and we are voting in two days on whether or not to allow physician assisted suicide. I oppose the law. I haven't been happy with the arguments against it, though. Here are the major ones I have seen:

The question is poorly written.  If it was well-written would you vote for it? I wouldn't. Still, if you are not morally opposed to physician-assisted suicide, this is something to consider. 

Predicting the end of life is difficult. Very true. My grandmother lived more than 10 years after the doctors told her she had two weeks. An important point. Still, even if we could accurately predict the end of life, I would oppose this law. 

The question doesn't require patients requesting a prescription to end life to receive counseling or meet with a psychiatrist or psychologist.  If this safeguard were in place, I would still vote no on this question.

The prescription could be provided by any doctor, regardless of specialty. I am guessing that most doctors whose specialties rarely involve the terminally ill -- eye doctors, podiatrists, etc., -- would not be writing these prescriptions. But, again, even if there were restrictions, I would not vote for this law. 

Proposed safeguards are not adequate and will allow for elder abuse. That's horrible in and of itself, but if adequate protective measures were included I would still oppose this measure. 


Clearly my oppostion to Question 2 is not related to safeguards and procedures. It's about respect for life. The law already allows people to refuse any medical treatment, even if it would save their life. Pain medication and other palliative measures are available to those who want them.

If we enact this law, we may well set up an environment in which people will begin to see the terminally ill as a burden. There will be subtle undercurrents and societal pressures that will cause those with heartbreaking diagnoses to see it as their duty to die and relieve their caregivers of difficult responsibilty. It will blur the line between medical care and mercy killing.

I see the intentional taking of life as playing God. Even if you don't believe in God, can see that putting one's self in the place of a deity is wrong: It is not for us to decide who lives and who dies.

Please, if you live in Massachusetts, vote no on question 2. 







Thursday, October 25, 2012

"The Talk" And beyond

It's that season in our house. Early adolesence. Time to pass on certain information.


Oh, well, really?? Yikes!! Awkward conversations. Surly looks. Yada. Yada.

Actually, our son has had an understanding of the basics of reproductive biology for years now.  He also knows what we believe on the moral side of things. It would be easier if those by themselves were enough, but...

We believe in waiting until marriage to have sex.

                      So how far is too far?
                      How do you wait when you're in a relationship with someone who doesn't want to?
                      What do you do about desire?

Those are things we need to talk about. Yeah, awkward. Tough. Necessary.

And we are facing some rather difficult to surmount societal expectations:
                   
                    I know a health teacher who says: "Abstinence is a great idea, but these kids are in eighth 
                    grade. Let's face it, they are going to be having sex." 

                    I read a survey which noted that, overwhelmingly, parents feel that teenagers should wait
                   before having sex, but assume that their kids won't.

                   I read an article in a magazine aimed at young teen girls that said. "Waiting for sex leads 
                  to a longer and healthier relationship, so if your guy wants to wait a month before hitting 
                 the sheets it is probably a good sign."



Maybe there is a self -fulfilling prophecy going on here. I am a teacher, so I call it the "Pygmalion concept". You get what you expect and society expresses the expectation that teens will have sex. Or, if they are sensible, they will wait until they finish high school. So kids are having sex. Not so many in eighth grade, actually, but pretty young nonetheless.


 How do you overcome the societal expectation and help your child do what is right?

                 

As traditional as "The Talk" is, I'm figuring it's not enough. A series of conversations would be a start. Frequently reiterating that we will discuss ANYTHING will help, especially if web bring up tough topics ourselves now and then to prove it. Putting people who share our moral code in our child's path wouldn't hurt either.

And then there is prayer. Never to be forgotten. God can handle a blundering conversation or two (or 100) with us. After all,  He made up sex. It was all His idea. I am going to teach my son to pray about it, too.


We are going to stand firm on the idea that sex is for marriage. Not everyone will agree with us on that, but every parent does have to talk with their kids about sensitive topics because every kid needs information, every kids needs to know where their parents stand.

How will you make that less awkward in your family?











This is my 25th post for the October Ultimate Blog Challenge. Home stretch!





Saturday, April 30, 2011

Putting it in God's hands.



So I am trying a new tack on the home improvement/lead paint thing I talked about in yesterday's blog. I am letting God take care of it.


Well, I am trying to at least. I prayed and told Him I was putting it in His hands. Now, I just have to stop worrying about it. I wish I had thought of this earlier. Really, it should be where I started, but better late than never, right?




God tells us:


Trust in the LORD with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways submit to him,
and he will make your paths straight.

Proverbs 3:5-6

and


“But whoever listens to me will dwell safely, and will be secure, without fear of evil.”

Proverbs 1:33

and


“I will instruct you and teach you in the way should go; I will guide you with My eye.”

Psalm 32:8


I am guessing the King of the Universe, the one who created lead in the first place, can handle a bit -- or more than in a bit -- in some old paint. I really am not sure what He is going to do here, but I am hoping I can trust enough to find out. Pray for me will you?



Blessings on your day!

Friday, April 29, 2011

Home Maintenance Confusion

I am kinda out of my element when it comes to fixing things. Or knowing what to fix. Or when to fix it. It's a big question, what to tackle and what to let go. Right now even the crash course I have had since I became the church's house committee chair isn't helping.


Yesterday, I met with two painting contractors about dealing with lead paint at my new house. It had actually taken a while to figure out where all the lead paint was and where it wasn't. We have figured that out and so I had the two painters in to give me quotes for removing the crumbling lead paint that's between the window sashes and storm windows, and repaint of course.


The first guy told me not to waste my money paying him. He said that the lead would only be a problem if a child ate a hole window sill full. He said that I should scrape the paint myself and then put a mask on my son and have him follow behind me with a shop vac and vacuum the stuff up. I asked about dust and he said, "That's all hype." He said for him to do the job would mean taking off the storm windows and that would be very labor intensive.


The second guy told me it was lead dust, not paint chips, that are the problem. He told me that covering the windows on the inside, taking the storms off and doing the job from the outside would be cheaper and easier on my family than sealing off each room separately. He also pointed out a few other areas of lead concern that he recommended be handled before we moved in, but he said we really didn't have a serious lead problem compared to others he had seen. A few issues he said I could handle myself because it just meant going over intact paint. A few he thought needed scraping and the use of lead-safe procedures.


Now who do I believe? I felt more confident of the information given me by painter number two. He seemed both more knowledgeable and more competent as he spoke of state requirements, even though he was much younger and much less experienced.

But, appearances can be deceiving. Perhaps he is just more professional in demeanor.

And what if his quote is too high? Can I safely do this myself? Every booklet and website I've seen that explains how includes an encouragement to hire a lead certified contractor to handle the job instead. But often, on the forums of those sites, there are people who talk about there being too much concern over lead. Some even say no protections are needed.


My head is spinning. I don't know how to figure it out. What's OK and what's not? What is necessary and what is overkill?

I am feeling my way here and I feel anxious. I am just not sure how to proceed.



That's what's on my mind today.