Bittersweet Beginning

Today was another beginning for our family.

A bittersweet one, because it is also the beginning of the end.

Today is the first day of my son's senior year of high school. So it is the beginning of the end of his school years. The last first day of school he will ever have as a student.

It is also the beginning of the end of our homeschooling journey as we have no younger children.

And the beginning of the end of our parenting journey, as when this boy leaves for college or wherever he might go, we will encounter the beginning of the college years and the start of empty nesting all at once. This is how it is for parents of singletons. We have moved through the other stages and now need to move toward becoming consultants to our child.

I want to be conscious of savoring this year, of enjoying this final year of our learning adventure and the transition of my son to adulthood.  We will have senior pictures and final fairs and, ultimately, a graduation ceremony. The rituals that mark endings that are also beginnings. Today has been both joyous and sad and I am sure that other events will be also. There are also the routine endings. It struck me this morning that I will never again assign summer reading to Jordan. I'd forgotten that at the start of the summer.

Letting go can be sad and that is what this season is for. I hope that it doesn't become to overshadowed by college applications and FAFSA forms. Or my need to complete what I see as unfinished.

I pray that this final year cements us as a family and allows for the final forming of both roots and wings.

God bless your journey my boy, both this year and after. I love you and am proud of who you are becoming.

Earth Day and Science

Today is Earth Day. 


There is also a march for science happening, as people feel that science is being threatened by the current government. Along with the big march in Washington, there have been marches in cities all over the country. People are pointing out how science as helped us and how badly needed it is. 

One quote going around is: 

“The good thing about science is that it's true whether or not you believe in it.”

                                                                          ~Neil deGrasse Tyson

My personal response to that is this statement, that I posted on Facebook:

Science helps us explore the universe and our own back yards. It gives us a systematic way to observe and test what's around us. Science really isn't true or false, it helps us discover what is true or false about the physical world. It is highly important that we have people well educated in scientific method and aware of what has been learned and discovered in the past. Science and science education need to be supported. 

Science isn't something to be "believed in." It's a process (or a set of processes) which help us to learn many things. It has it's limits. It changes over time.

Put it in the context of Earth Day. Climate change is a big issue. It would be hard to say based on scientific evidence that global warming isn't real. It would also be difficult to argue that it isn't human driven. But scientists don't claim to have found out everything about this phenomenon. They are still studying, seeking causes and remedies, refining theories. Views on the specifics change all the time and vary from scientist to scientist. Also, no scientists studies all aspects of it. Some study the greenhouse effect, others melting glaciers, others the connection to increased severe weather events.

Here's another thing. Science doesn't tell us how to behave. Scientific discoveries can show us what the consequences of certain actions will be, but it doesn't offer moral evaluation. It's not meant to do that.

Science also isn't either good evil. It is how it is used that determines that. Remember scientists  have brought us both the cure for polio and the atomic bomb. Healing and destruction.

Personally, I believe that God gave us the inquiring and curious minds that have lead to the development of science. His Word can also give guidance in how to use it, to build the Kingdom of God rather than tear people down. 

Judeo- Christian culture historically supported science and allowed it to flourish. Check out more on that here: Are Christianity and Science Compatible?  There have been many clashes between science and the church, but really theology and science, if each is rightly understood can be complementary. 

One final response to Mr. Tyson's statement: 

God is real and alive and good, whether you believe in him or not. 

And that doesn't change the fact that science is important.

April 7, 1933: The Return of Beer

My great-grandfather was a poet. An unpublished one, but I have his poems in a little green book with little red labels saying "My Poetry Book" and Vol. 1 on the side. It's not full, so I don't know that there ever was a Vol. 2.

He wrote about his world, what was happening to him, and his own family. On April 7, 1933 he penned his only poem with a date. That was the day that Congress repealed the Volstead Act, allowing the sale of beer with less than 3.2 percent alcohol. Eight months later, Prohibition was repealed altogether. My great -grandfather wrote a poem rejoicing in the return of beer, but also sounding a cautionary note.

To the Return of Beer

April 7, 1933

Well, good old beer is here again

And has caused quite a sensation

And with it comes prosperity,   

And an income to the nation

Now a man can drink a glass, 

And not feel he's doing wrong, 

He has gained a new freedom, 

That he has wanted, so long.

Let's hope he will enjoy it,

and not abuse, this new right,

Let's hope he'll be contented, 

And drink in a way that's right.

There is no harm in drinking, 

Amongst a gathering of friends, 

But the beer, let's have cheer, 

And good fellowship to the end. 

                                               ~ John F. Henderson, Sr.

What do you think of the message of this poem? 

Do you have any writers in your background who have left a perspective on history?

For more information on the repeal of the Volstead Act and Prohibition, go here: 

April 7, 1933: Gimme a Tall, Cold One - Wired

(Belated) Song for Sunday: Sister Suffragettes

I almost forgot to write this blog post and I haven't written in so long I am not sure I have any readers left, but anyway, here goes.


We watched Mary Poppins as a family not too long ago and I was struck by this song. It hopefully sings out:

"Our daughter's daughters will adore us
as they sing in grateful chorus
'Well done, Sister Suffragettes'"

Alas, I think in general it's wrong. Not about women voting, about their granddaughters being thankful...or even remembering.

It's election day here in the US and many women are wearing white as a sign of thankfulness for women's right to vote and run for political office. We have, for the first time, a female candidate from a major political party running for president. (We have actually had women candidates for years and, by the way, this doesn't indicate how I voted. I am not going there here.)  But most of the time I think we forget that gaining the right to vote was the hard won struggle of women who worked for nearly century to gain suffrage. And it hasn't even been a century since they succeeded.

This is a fun song. It's also humorous, contrasting a wife's progressive views with her husband's staunchly traditional ones.

The women's suffrage movement had a bit of a checkered history, making alliances with racists and advocating violent action. I don't condone either of those tactics.

I am, however, grateful to be able to vote...and enjoy Mary Poppins.

Check out this link on the history of the Suffragette Movement in the US.
http://www.history.com/topics/womens-history/the-fight-for-womens-suffrage
And in England:
http://www.parliament.uk/about/living-heritage/transformingsociety/electionsvoting/womenvote/overview/startsuffragette-/



Did you vote?

Meme-ic Monday: The Library

It has been said -- I found it quoted in several places -- that the public library is the poor man's university. Perhaps it should be poor person's university. 

You can learn about literally anything at a good public library, and most libraries can borrow from other libraries, even university libraries, if they don't have information on what you are looking for themselves. 

Many libraries provide free internet access as well, opening a plethora of online courses and resources about just about anything. 

Libraries even offer classes themselves. J and I have learned how to write resumes and do well on job interviews, we've supplemented our geography and history knowledge at engaging lectures, met interesting people at reenactments, and tasted new foods at cooking demonstrations. J has also learned how to program 3D printables in tinkercad, how to solder, and how to code computer games. On top of learning how to find books and do basic research. All for free. All at local public libraries. 

And that's just a sample. 

Libraries aren't free of course. Our taxes pay for them. Which makes it all the better to use them well to support lifelong learning. 

They aren't quite free, but they are a blessing and a help. I thank God for them. 

So I encourage you to get to the library, support your library, enjoy your library.  It's yours, after all.

I mean, that's Albert Einstein up there in that meme. He was a smart dude. And he went to the library. 

I dedicate this post to the memory of my sister Pam, a dedicated library director, who passed away a few months ago. Her town was better for her educational leadership. We were all better for knowing her. Love you, Pam!

Beads, Beads, Beads

New Orleans is known for Mardi Gras and Mardi Gras is known for beads (among other things.)

Today was a day when two things that are important to me came to the forefront of our work here: the environment and opportunities for adults with intellectual disabilities.

The Mardi Gras Recycling Company is one of several projects run by the Arc of Greater New Orleans. Tens of thousands of pounds of the beads thrown from parade floats during Carnival Season are put into collection bins and sent to the Arc. There, workers who have intellectual disabilities sort, band, and bag them. Then they sell them back to the krewes (groups) that run parades. Today, a number of us helped them for a few hours. 

This isn't really recycling, it's reusing. That's even better for the environment, as recycling takes significant energy and can put things into the environment that might be better left out. It's worth noting that even with this project and a similar one in the city, most of the beads still end up in landfills. Since the beads are plastic, they'll stay there forever. Quite sad, really. 

Another thing to note is that the workers at the Arc get at least minimum wage, not the piece or percentage rates of sheltered workshops. They also receive training so they can get better jobs later. 

We also toured the French Quarter today and learned a new word. More on that tomorrow. Oh, and by the way, we learned that while the unsavory or risque aspects of Carnival & Mardi Gras get tons of press, much of it is very family friendly. 

What programs do  you know of that do well helping the environment or people with disabilities or both? What causes are important to you?

Restart

Every once in a while, here at Musings, I need to start over. I haven't written in so long, it's likely people have forgotten to watch. In this case it's been over two months -- since July 19.

So what do I have to say...

 A lot's happened.

 CYC, my favorite ministry, celebrated it's 100th anniversary! There was a Gala Banquet with alumni, staff, and even a few campers. It was amazing. We all knew the same songs and how to respond to code phrases, chants, etc. It was a celebration of continuity, of ministry, of changed lives. And it was fun!! Very loud, very enjoyable.

On the personal side my son started 10th grade and we are wading into geometry proofs, Tinkercad and writing resumes. Plus, we are reading 2001: A Space Odyssey. 

I've started a new job, as youth leader of a local church, and taken on the position of planning chair for CYC.

Human trafficking continues to be on my brain.

Oh, and I am working an a recipe for S'mores Pie.

I hope to write a few times a week and I am planning an update to the look of the blog.


Hope you'll follow along!

What's new with you?



Blog post #1 for the October 2015 Ultimate Blog Challenge.

He has a Job

My son has a job.


Oh, he's had little jobs before, like cutting a neighbor's bushes, but this is a bit bigger. Hours every week.


It's actually a volunteer job. It involves two things: helping a librarian plan and present a science program for elementary kids and developing activities on a gaming server for the same age group.


His work does involve showing up for planning sessions, preparation times, and lessons. It also involves a lot of self-directed hours. Almost all of the server work has been "on his own."


It's crazy to think he's old enough to have a job. I want him to still be little!! On the other hand, it's great to see him grow into these responsibilities. He's learning how to manage his time, handle anxiety and deal with slacking coworkers. It has been a fabulous experience for him.


Of course, it also means this is a different kind of summer for us. We have to plan our family time around his schedule. (My husband is a school teacher and so sets his own hours --and there are plenty of them-- in the summer. I am a stay at home Mom) But this change is just a harbinger of the greater changes to come as he moves toward adulthood. I guess small steps like this are good as they make big changes later less overwhelming.




Anyway, he has a job.


What changes are going on with your children and family?

School Violence

Please read the whole post. It could be easy to take the beginning out of context.


I was listening to the news on the radio when I heard the teaser:

"Despite efforts, violence continues unabated in schools."

My first thought was that a riot had broken out in a high school somewhere and the authorities were having trouble quelling it. But, no, it was a story about school shootings and a study that showed that there are just as many now as in the '90s.

Don't get me wrong. One school shooting is one too many. All of them are tragedies.

But this headline struck me as irresponsible. It made it sound as though shootings and major crimes were happening constantly in the nation's schools.

Part of the story was that there have been 11 school shootings this school year. The school year starts in August in much of the country so that's in a period of six months.

According to the National Center for Educational Statistics there were 132,183 elementary, middle and high schools in the US in the 2009-2010 school year. That includes both public and private schools. If 11 is an accurate number of school shootings this school year, that means that  0.0083217963% of our nations schools have experienced a shooting in the past six months. Less than 100th of 1%.


Again, statistics don't tell the whole story. It is not a comfort to a parent mourning the loss of their child that this is such a rarity. However, it should be a reassurance to parents who choose to send their children to school.


Remember, nowhere is perfectly safe... not our homes, our cars, the sidewalk, movie theaters, malls, worship spaces or schools. It's not just violence that is of concern, we also have fires, carbon monoxide, accidents and other things to worry about. We have to live our lives. Perfect security will hinder teaching, learning and living.

It may be true that 90% of schools have "violent incidents" each year although in most cases calling them that is an exaggeration of sorts. It includes schools that have school yard fights, tussles in the hallway, a student tripping another in class. These things aren't OK, but they hardly warrant a media storm. Sure we need to teach children to do better. They are children and they still have to learn. I witnessed school fights as a child, even participated in a couple. There were consequences, discipline. There still is for such things. Plus, what percentage of families with two or more children has had incidences of biting, punching, kicking, hair pulling? I wouldn't be surprised if it was all of them. Very few children come with a perfect temperament and manners in place at birth.


Schools have also been taking the problem of bullying more seriously in the past few years. Peer training, legal initiatives, firmer consequences and curriculum for all students are hopefully leading to reductions in that behavior.


I did an internet search on school shootings. The first article I found made disturbing claims. Said that 40% of schools have a problem with severe crime. Even said that our schools are terrorist breeding grounds because of the level of violence. Couldn't back those statements up, though. (If you want to check it out here's the link)




I found several other stories about school shootings. One mentioned, in a photo caption, that school shootings are relatively rare. The rest did not say anything about the statistics. Two Wikipedia articles came up. One defined school shooting and gave no examples. The other listed all the school shootings in the US from 1764 on.


We need to mourn for the people who are victims of school shootings and support and pray for those harmed by lesser crimes. We need to recognize that these things can happen in school and take steps to protect our children and teach children to protect themselves.


But we also need to remember that the vast majority of our schools are not awash in violence. We need to keep perspective and remember the hundreds of thousands of caring teachers, administrators and employees who are present to care for the children. I am sure they would appreciate our support and prayers.. and want us to know that, they too, want schools to be safe for our children. And they generally make it so.

Back Yard LARP

My son asked me awhile ago if we could run a LARP in our backyard for him and his friends. So, last Sunday that’s what we did. It was the first time I had ever run a LARP, so I ended up learning a few things.

           

First, for those of you for whom this is a new topic, LARP stands for “Live-Action Role Play.” It’s a hobby in which people take on characters and interact with other characters to solve puzzles and problems, fight enemies, and achieve a set goal. There is a plot for each event that is established by a plotmaster or staff ahead of time.

The plot for our event involved a group of young students forced to cross a war torn country to get to a portal that would take them to a palace and safety. Along the way they had to solve puzzles in order to collect pieces of the key to the portal.

Glossary:

Boffer weapon – a weapon consisting of foam-wrapped core

Mod – a scene or happening within a game, such as a battle or a feast

NPC – non-player character, the portray the characters the players encounter as they work through the plot.

PC – player character, someone who is playing the game

What worked:

The scene changes went well. They were prepped ahead and the NPCs readily pitched in to make them work. I tried to keep most things simple, but I wanted stuff to look good, too. I think the scenery was good. I got to use my giant chess board. I had a cave and a river and  a wizened tree.

Some thing that could be adjusted:

I think if I did this again I would arrange for a separate room upstairs for the NPCs to put their costumes and weapons. I wasn’t prepared for the sheer volume of stuff they brought. They used it to make the evening utterly fun for the boys and I am glad it was there but a better space for it might have been useful.

The kids’ evaluation:

The boys said that they wanted to do this again. One gave it a 9/10. Two boys said they would have liked a deeper plot. On the other hand there were a couple of them who seemed to not be worried about the plot at all. Deep plots are hard to manage for one-off events, especially those designed specifically for kids. However, if I do this again, I’ll go for something more layered.

What the NPCs had to say:

“You started and ended on time.” Apparently that is quite an achievement in the LARPing world.

“The next event is all combat training.” We started off with the boys at a “swordcraft school” and used that mod to teach them the basics of boffer fighting. Things like no head shots, how to count their hit points and what makes a legal hit. There really wasn’t  enough time for that and the boys needed frequent reminders to not hit too hard, to avoid the head and groin and not to keep hitting a monster that was down. So maybe we’ll do an event all for that – no plot, no characters, no costumes, just teaching.

“Just have a basic plot and then let things happen.” OK – I’ll try not to be quite so directive next time. I teach kids.

“Add spellcasters.” Next time. I wanted to keep things simple. Most of these kids have never LARPed before.

A couple of things I would have done differently:

I think I would have had the NPCs come a little earlier than the players. While two NPCs ran the first mod, I met with the others but then I never filled in those two. Everything did work out, but maybe a few minutes to get organized would have been better.

I would have delegated food preparation ahead of time. I had done most things ahead and the players brought potluck, but I had planned to do the final bits of cooking and heating up myself. That was not going to work, but fortunately when I asked for someone to “IRL make pasta” a friend stepped up and handled the kitchen. It went fine, but having handed it off ahead may have prevented a bit of stress.

One thing I was very glad for:

The NPCs. A friend of mine gathered an awesome team, combining some mutual friends of ours with some people from a game she plays in. The organizer of that game actually gave in game advantages to players who came to my house to bring LARPing to kids. I was very grateful to my friend for organizing these people and to each of them for turning up with their costumes, weapons, energy and teaching skills. (Oh, and there was this cute little skeleton NPC—so awesome!)

Some things never change:

LARPing has always attracted more men than women, although there are some ladies thoroughly dedicated to the hobby. Jordan and I invited plenty of both boys and girls to the party. On the day, we had 10 boys show up. Not one girl came. Amongst the NPCs/adults the men outnumbered the women 7-4 – and one of the women was a Mom who decided to hang around and watch her son. I have no idea what drives that gender gap but it seems to be real.

Basically, I think it was a fun day. I am hoping we can repeat it and make it even better.

LARPing is “just a game” but it is one that requires people to think, work out strategies and find solutions. At the same time, with boffer LARPS, you can get a pretty decent physical work out. I am glad my son enjoys this pastime and can share it with his friends. 

What are your hobbies? What benefits do you see in them?

Have you stretched yourself recently? What did you learn?

Craft Time: Giant Chess Board

I found myself needing a giant chess board.

I am the parent advisor/teacher for my son's chess club and we like to do dress up and have a live action game now and then. Last year we used painter's tape and a permanent black marker on a white plastic table cloth. It was a one time use solution and the squares were too small (1 foot).

Then my son started helping a family friend plan a Harry Potter party, based on the Sorcerer's Stone. They needed a giant chess board for one of the scenes.

I volunteered to make one. I wanted a reusable board that would stand up to child use and provide enough room for live action players to stand comfortably. I started by searching for used sheets via my friends, freecycle, etc. It didn't work out.

I ended up at the fabric store with a small budget. I discovered some heavy "eco felt" (made from recycled stuff) marked way down from it's usual price. Bingo!

 It was 72 inches wide and I bought 4 yards of black and 4 of white. My son and I cut out 64 eighteen inch squares (32 white, 32 black).

The next part was the most daunting part for me. Honestly, sewing 60 straight seams sounded tedious. Afriend volunteerd to help. (Thanks, L!!) Things are friendlier and quicker with two, and in one evening, fueled by chocolate mint fudge, we sewed 16 strips of four squares each, alternating black and white. We used 5/8 inch seams, but any seam size will do as long as it is consistent.

 

A few days later, I pressed the seams open so they wouldn't be bulky.

Then, I sewed four sets of four strips together with right sides together, being careful of the checkerboard pattern.  I ended up with four pieces of 16 squares each. Again, I used  5/8 inch seams.

 I had considered various options for connecting the four pieces. I thought of Velcro (too likely to gather dirt), zippers (expensive and time consuming at 6 ft each) and sewing. In the end, I borrowed a solution from a blogging buddy: Duct tape: (Check out: DIY Cheap and Chic Outdoor Area Rug). This solution allows for maintaining the board in four pieces which are easier to store than one whole and the pieces can be washed at home, rather than in the commercial size washers at the Laundromat.

To use this solution:

Put right sides of two pieces together, being careful to preserve the checkerboard pattern. Pin the seams together:

 For each square, stretch duct tape from seam to seam on one side.

 Lift and press the tape down on the other side, forming a seam. Remove pins.

 

Repeat this with the other two pieces, taking care that this new side matches the checkerboard on the other side.

 

Then, pin and duct tape the two sides together, being careful to remove the pins. You then have a ready to use chessboard:

 

We look forward to using our chessboard many times. I hope this is helpful if you ever need something similar.

What crafts have you made lately?

 

First six photos by J. Parry. Final Photo by J. Brown.

 

On Facebook

My son now has a Facebook account. We allowed it primarily so that he can have access to his photography group without going through my account and so that he can keep in touch with geographically distant relatives.

We are, however, limiting who he can friend. It's a very short list. Family and a few friends from church and CYC. That's it. Also, he does not have his password yet. He can only log on with a parent. He also has to be friends with his parents.

This isn't just -- or even primarily -- a concern over "safety" and "appropriateness." Those are factors. Jordan needs to learn how to deal with dangerous situations in all contexts, including online. It's also important for him to recognize when something isn't appropriate for him to see --whether it's just for now or ever -- and look away.

There's another aspect of social media that needs to be addressed and is probably the most important. My son needs to learn how to present himself online. Whether he is updating his own status, commenting on someone else's or sharing a link, he needs to think about how others will perceive it and if he's sending the message he intends. Is he coming across politely and respectfully? Is he being unintentionally hurtful? Could his phrasing be clearer?

Some of this will be learned by trial and error. That's part of the reason for starting with a small friends list. These are people who will "love him anyway" if he missteps. I will also be giving him some guidance in these early days so that he understands the why of certain things and doesn't go too far out of line.

That's not to say I'll be constantly looking over his shoulder. Unless he asks for my help with wording, private chats and messages will be for him and the recipient. Only if he gets a message from someone he doesn't know or one that makes him feel uncomfortable is he required to disclose it. It's the more public stuff I want to help him navigate.

I also want to ensure that he doesn't become either overwhelmed or "obsessed" with online stuff. I see that as a parent's role.

Gradually, we will release full responsibility for my son's online behavior and connections to him. Our hope is that this time of training will prepare him to make wise decisions.


What has been your experience with young teens online?




___________________________________________________________________________________________

Christian Youth Conference at Ocean Park (CYC) is a quality two week leadership development program for high school teens. Meeting for two weeks in August on the beautiful southern coast of Maine, it offers a blend of worship, Christian education and recreation. Check it out! 

Extreme Legos

Jordan went to a Lego event recently. He was given a base and told to build whatever he wanted on it. His "creation" would then be added to a map of the US. The organizers hoped to fill the whole map before the end of the weekend.

Jordan, in the midst of Iron Man fever (though he's never actually seen the movie) decided to build a tall version of Tony Stark's Malibu Mansion.

He was, as you can see in this clip very intent on his work. The staff asked him what his plan was and he said he wanted to build something tall. They  told him the limit was four feet. I don't know what he was originally thinking of as "tall," but he took that as a challenge. Four feet or bust. The staff got behind him, helping him find the pieces he needed and cheering him on.


He had to change his design a few times. because of the pieces that were available. He showed great flexibility. He added new ideas as went along. (Does Tony Stark play golf?)




It took over two hours (in the middle of the day on Friday -- yay, homeschooling!) but he did it.
Then he had a little celebration:

The staff asked him where on the map he wanted it. He said "California, of course. That's where Malibu is." So they put it there.

It was an adventure. It was fun to see so many people rooting for a kid and helping him to accomplish a goal. Children shouldn't expect to be the center of attention most of the time, but once in a while, it's probably good for them.

A final clip showing how he feels about his work. Quite proud of himself, really.

                                                     


When have you seen a child work at something?



Sorry about the orientation of the videos. I don't know how to rotate them. If you do please let me know!

Besides my son, I get to watch teens from the Christian Youth Conference at Ocean Park accomplish things all the time. Two weeks at the beach in August experiencing Christian community and learning leadership skills? What's not to love?

Enticing Children

Many types of cereal come with a toy or children's  DVD in the box. I have noticed that it is almost exclusively the more highly-sugared varieties with artificial colors, marshmallows and/or a lack of whole grain that offer these extras. I wondered why.

It's just a guess, but I think cereal companies figure that parents will buy the healthier cereals anyway. They also will be the more likely choice of childless adults. Companies need to get the not so healthy cereals sold, so they add on the plastic goodies and bet on parents not saying "no" to a whiny child in the grocery store.

Many teen health programs also contend that  tobacco companies target teens and younger kids with their advertising methods.

I was speaking to a tobacco educator a few days ago and she was explaining how small, flavored cigars are sold for less money than candy. They are also displayed at kid-eye level if bright foil packages. I checked out a local shop and found that she was right, though the price was slightly higher than she had said. These cigars are no safer than cigarettes, but they don't carry the tax so they can be sold cheaply.

Studies show that between 80 and 90% of people who smoke begin before age 18. It is critical for the tobacco companies to hook high- schoolers if they want a future base of customers. It appears that they push by advertising on shows teens favor and in a manner that will catch their attention. For more info, try these links:

              http://www.livestrong.com/article/195520-why-do-people-start-smoking-tobacco/

 

http://suite101.com/article/tobacco-advertising-and-teens-a13273

 

http://articles.washingtonpost.com/2011-12-12/national/35284919_1_stores-check-identification-youth-cigar-teens-smoke

 

As parents, educators and youth ministers, we need to be aware of these tactics and arm our kids against them. Study after study shows that kids do listen to parents. Start telling kids young not to smoke, and keep telling them. Set the right example.

 

That goes for overly sugar, low-nutrient cereal and various other stuff that's not good for us, too.

 

 

 

How do you teach your kids to be healthy?

Challenging Youth

I took my son to a conference on global poverty today. There was an excellent program and I will share some of the solutions discussed in future blogs.

Today, I want to talk about challenging teens and respecting their intelligence. I know some people who do this very well. I also know that there are many groups, organizations and people who take the idea that adolescence should be a good time or a chance to blow off steam before the responsibilities of adulthood. I wonder, though, how well prepared such kids will be for those responsibilities.

My son was the only child at the conference. I took him as part of his schooling. He heard people talk about subsistence living, compassion, and the dream destroying effects of real poverty. He learned about biosand filters, medical missions, microfinance, farmers' cooperatives and how the Gospel of Jesus Christ has changed lives and communities in various contexts. He would have asked a question of one of the speakers but someone else asked that same question first. It was a good question. He made comments about some of the visuals.

My son seemed to grasp what was being discussed, except when the keynote speaker gave his talk. That man was discussing "fiscal restraint," "austerity measures," and "debt liquidation." Challenging concepts even for adults, especially those who haven't studied economic theory. Still, the boy listened, only fidgeting a little, and maybe learned something. At one point, I told him he could go hang around outside during the rest of the final speech. He chose to stay.

This was an adult conference and Jordan did fine. Much as the proud Momma in me wants to think that Jordan is exceptionally bright (he is rather smart) he really isn't all that unusual. Teens can handle a lot. They just need the opportunity and, like all of us, the encouragement not to be intellectually lazy.


A pastor I know has repeatedly stated, "Don't talk down to teens." In our homes, schools, communities and, perhaps especially, our churches we need to encourage kids to reach their full potential. In fact we need to push them. It's part of parenting and part of youth ministry.


That's my opinion any way. What's yours?






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The academic program at the Christian Youth Conference at Ocean Park has been raising the bar, working with the kids to give them a solid foundation in Biblical literacy, basic doctrine and church leadership skills. (We do throw in some fun during the two-week conference, too.) In August, on the beautiful southern coast of Maine. Check it out!

Follow Ups

So yesterday I posted "An Irish Lullabye" as my song for Sunday, noting it was written in 1914 by James Royce Shannon. Then I cam across some trivia which credited the song to Chauncey Olcott and claimed it was on the "Top Ten" list for 1913. I did a little to figure out what the correct information was. As far as I can determine, the song was written by James Royce Shannon in 1913 for a play by Chauncey Olcott  called Shameen Dhu which debuted in  New York City in February of 1914. Moral? Don't trust either Wikipedia or A trivia calendar to be perfectly accurate.


Last week, I posted about Oz the Great and Powerful, wondering if the theological allusions in it were intentional. A friend mentioned that she had heard that the Oz books were shot through with Christian allegory and so maybe the movie producers had intentionally incorporated some. I hadn't heard that, so I decided to check it out.

I asked my husband, who is in the thick of directing a reader's theater version of The Wizard of Oz if he had heard about Christian imagery in the books. He hadn't but it lead to a larger discussion. My son jumped in. "Are you thinking to hard about this? You have a group of people making requests." Ahh...

Thinking simply, along those lines, Dorothy's longing for home could symbolize the Christian's longing for the heavenly kingdom. So maybe....

Research... many people have used The Wizard of Oz as an analogy for the Christian life. L. Frank Baum however was not a Christian. His Methodist parents sent him to a Sunday School which intentionally taught ethics without religion, believing religious decisions should be made by adults. In adulthood, Mr. Baum became a Theosophist. Members of this spiritual group seek divine wisdom by studying a variety of religions and teachers. They see God in all nature and all nature as divine.

It seems unlikely that Mr. Baum intentionally incorporated Christian theology and teaching in his books. He did have some political messages and satire woven into them, though I never recognized that either. The scarecrow was a common image in political cartoons at the turn of the century.

The Wizard of Oz is one of my favorite children's tales. And I did enjoy this new movie.


Have a blessed day.

Cast free!!

Got my cast off today. Yeah!! I'll be celebrating in a little while with a looong hot shower.

Jordan had fun watching the removal process and was quite relieved to see the thing go. He figures I won't be treating him quite so much like a house elf now. (I am a good master, really. Quite benign.)

With the blizzard aftermath, getting to my doctor's appointment was interesting...harrowing even.

The worst part was actually getting into the office building. Strangely enough, it is not handicap accessible. This bewilders me. I mean, an orthepedist deals with bone and joint problems, right? Including breaks, brittle bones, and knee replacements. Some of their patients must be in wheelchairs. There have to be quite a few on crutches.

Yet, there is no parking lot. We had to use a public lot a bit down the street. There are stairs with no ramp and the end of the walkway was not properly shoveled. The walkway itself was slippery. I only managed to get in by leaning heavily on my husband.

I mentioned to the receptionist, the x-ray technician and the doctor that the building had accessibility issues. They acknowledged that I was right and quickly changed the subject. I am a disabilities advocate, so this approach didn't really satisfy me. I didn't say anything then and there, but part of me wants to address this. I am looking into the best way to go about it.

If the office doesn't receive any federal funding and there hasn't been any recent construction, they may well be within the law. It still doesn't make sense though.

What do you think? Should I complain or let it go?

Books Are Dangerous

Well, good books are. Ones that have something to say, that make you think. Inane books can be fun or   help us take a break, but they aren't dangerous.

In The Giver, Lois Lowry asks us to imagine a "safe" society. Much has been taken away ... choice of spouse, choice of work, weather, color, love....and books. Each household has only three books: a dictionary, a practical guide to the community and a book of rules. In school, students are taught precision of language, science and technology, and civics. No history, no literature. Risk has been reduced, but at a price. There is no depth to life, no feelings. Things are always predictable, calm, the same. The community seems wrong, even before its darker side is revealed.

Taking away books and history is the only way for the community to function. If they had those things, the order of life would almost inevitably be challenged. If people could think for themselves, they would insist on choices and inevitably some would make the wrong ones. People generations back had chosen safety over freedom.

As we let our children read books, we expose them to new ideas and new ways of thinking. It's a risk. They may grow up to be different from us, perhaps in ways that will break our hearts. They may choose wrong paths.

But, if we keep them on the right path by limiting what they read too far, they aren't actually choosing the right path. They are just following, without really understanding what they are doing and they might do that all their lives..... a frightening thought.

Beyond that, being dangerous isn't the same as being evil. Here's a quote from one of my favorite books:

Gimli said, "But you speak of him as if he were a friend. I thought Fangorn was dangerous."
    "Dangerous!" cried Gandalf. "And so am I, very dangerous: more dangerous than anything you will ever meet, unless you are brought alive before the seat of the Dark Lord. And Aragorn is dangerous, and Legolas is dangerous. You are beset with dangers, Gimli son of Gloin; for you are dangerous yourself, in your own fashion. Certainly the forest of Fangorn is perilous - not least to those that are too ready with their axes; and Fangorn himself, he is perilous too; yet he is wise and kindly nonetheless."

                                                                     J.R.R. Tolkien, The Two Towers

The protagonists -- honorable folk --  are here described as dangerous. They are -- lethal shots, deadly fighters. But they are right and good, as well. Only evil need fear them.

Books are dangerous because they change us. They can upset the status quo, give voice to injustice, sound warnings about trends and systems. They do it by introducing realities to people who haven't been able to see them, by planting new ideas.

Yes, some of those ideas are wrong, even evil. One of the things we need to learn is how to distinguish between good and bad arguments, right and wrong patterns, acceptable and unacceptable ways of thinking.  As we encounter these things in books and stories, we learn to evaluate them in the real world. It's an important part of education and a good reason to study a broad array of literature.


What dangerous books have you encountered? 
How have they changed you?




I am participating in the January 2013 Ultimate Blog Challenge.

Cold Toes .... Not, Anymore!! :)

I am on crutches. My left second metatarsil took exception to my sledding into a haybale and snapped. Silly thing.

 

I have a lovely blue cast which I am sure will aid my healing quite well. The only thing is that my toes are hanging out. It being January in New England they get cold. I am knitting myself a cover-up but knitting takes time.

A friend suggested that a Christmas stocking might be helpful. I tried it ….

 It looks ridiculous, especially since it is after epiphany and the Christmas season is over, but it works. It fits nicely and my toes are warm in it, even outdoors.

 I am thankful for my friend’s idea and pass it on in case it may be useful to anyone else.

What creative solutions have you found to difficulties?

Photos by Jordan Parry.

This is my fourth post for the January 2013 Ultimate Blog Challenge. Going for 31 posts in 31 days. Not doing so well thus far. You wouldn't think a broken foot would make writing difficult, would you?

"Bimbos in Bikinis" Follow-Up

A few days ago, I posted "Bimbos in Bikinis" about my concerns regarding how women are portrayed on the cards of a game marked for "10 & Up". I wrote to the publisher, explaining my general concern about the pictures of women on the cards and my specific concerns about the card called "The Flasher" and the age recommendation on the box.

I was not confident that I would get more than a form letter, but I very quickly recieved the following thoughtful response:

"We fully support the rights of parents to remove any cards from the _________ games that would clash with their own or their families' values; in fact, we encourage it, because we think that families playing games together is beneficial for everyone. Because everyone's values are slightly different, we think it would be a mistake for us to describe too narrow a circle around what we consider "acceptable."

[the game], in particular, is a parody of four-color superhero comics. Part of the parody is to shine a light on some of the tropes of this genre which are less enlightened, even unrealistic. Oversexualized female portrayals (and equally unrealistic male portrayals -- muscles just don't look like they're drawn sometimes!) are, for good or ill, one of the most commonly encountered features of superhero comics. If your son is a fan of comic books, then he's almost certainly seen art just as sexualized as that found in our game -- more so, probably, because comics these days strive for a realistic style (if not realistic effects!) and we're aiming at cartoons instead.  {Ed. Note: actually my son's comic book reading is limited.}

All that said, I will certainly pass your concerns along to [the production] team for further discussion."

Understanding the picures as parody, intended to point out the ridiculous way comic books portray both male and female bodies, makes me feel better about the game generally.  It puts it in the light of being part of the discussion, and so may actually be positive.

We are still not using some of the cards, and won't be. My son helped us decide which cards to remove. He was actually much more conservative about what should go than his father and I. We ended up returning several of the cards he took out. We also had a very good discussion with him about stereotypes, etc.

That really only leaves my concern about "The Flasher." I am still not at all happy about a card of a  man being sexually aggressive toward a woman being helpful in advancing in the game or of the producers making light of such an attack. I am hoping to have further dialogue with the company about that.

I just wanted to follow-up. The game is really fun and well-designed.

What kinds of things have you encountered with games?
Have you ever complained to a company? What kind of response did you get?










I am participating in the January 2013 Ultimate Blog Challenge.